Topi Kettunen

Sila Dev Log: Waffling on Next Steps but Getting Back on the Saddle

Some time ago, I was actively working on my own compiler project whenever I had spare time. Unfortunately, life got in the way, and the project sat on the back-burner for a while. A big reason was my new solo music project, which took up much of my energy.

Alongside recording, I’ve also been diving into Opusmodus for composition and analysis, a wonderful showcase of what Common Lisp can enable in creative domains.

Another factor behind the pause was that I had coded myself into a corner due to some early architectural decisions. I even tried refactoring, but although the codebase was still relatively small, it quickly became frustrating. The dynamic nature of Common Lisp, while incredibly powerful, made larger-scale refactoring feel trickier than I’d like. To be fair, that’s more a reflection of my skills than a flaw in Lisp itself. I still deeply value its flexibility, macro system, and directness.

Recently, I found myself needing to work quite a bit with C++ and LLVM in other contexts, which naturally made me wonder if my compiler project should make the jump as well. LLVM, in particular, seemed appealing: it already provides a robust backend infrastructure, excellent tooling, and cross-platform portability, which would spare me from reimplementing a lot of low-level machinery. The timing also aligned with my recent switch to an Apple Silicon machine. Since most of the existing code was tailored for x86-64, I was facing the task of implementing a new backend for aarch64 anyway. Using LLVM started to feel like not only a practical choice, but also an opportunity to learn its internals more deeply.

I briefly toyed with the idea of sidestepping the C++ API by generating LLVM IR directly from Lisp, which would have allowed me to keep most of my workflow in Lisp while still taking advantage of LLVM. However, I figured that diving into the C++ API would refresh my C++ knowledge and give me a more complete view of how LLVM is actually designed to be used. At the same time, I also considered jumping ship entirely and using a statically typed language like Haskell, which might have made large-scale refactoring and correctness guarantees easier in the long run.

Haskell, with its type system, has always impressed me, and projects like Coalton make that style of typing accessible within Common Lisp. Still, as much as I admire Haskell, it simply doesn’t spark the same joy as Lisp.

So despite the temptations of C++, LLVM, or even Haskell, I’ve decided to continue with good ol’ Common Lisp. It’s the language that excites me the most, and ultimately, joy in the process is what keeps projects like this alive.

RIP Ozzy Osbourne 1948-2025

Yet another massive loss in music. Black Sabbath was probably the first band I ever heard. Definitely the first band that I really got into. This was due to the fact my father introduced me into it when I was a literal baby. Hugely important band for me. Tragic loss.

Thank you for everything.

RIP Douglas McCarthy

This week has been horrible when it has come to death of musicians. We just lost Sly Stone and Brian Wilson. Now, one of the most influental artists for me, Douglas McCarthy from Nitzer Ebb. What a horrible year and week.

Nitzer Ebb along with Front 242 were probably the two most influental bands for me which made me eventually to delve more deeply into the realms of EBM and industrial. Naturally, after those came bands like Ministry and Nine Inch Nails that also have always been super important bands for me. Nitzer Ebb were for me the gateway drug into this sort of sonic world.

Thanks for everything!

Art Should Comfort the Disturbed and Disturb the Comfortable

I recently stumbled upon a beautiful quote from Cesar A. Cruz that I just wanted to ponder.

“Art should comfort the disturbed and disturb the comfortable”

Cruz’s quote is both provocative and elusive, a tidy aphorism masking a deeper tension. It implies a dual responsibility for art: to console those in pain while challenging those at ease. But who decides which group we belong to? What comforts one person might deeply unsettle another, and vice versa.

The beauty of Cruz’s idea is that it resists easy answers. Comfort isn’t inherently weak; it can heal. Discomfort isn’t automatically righteous; it can harm. Art lives in this paradox, in the liminal space where consolation and confrontation coexist. Cruz’s words don’t prescribe solutions, they challenge us to sit with the ambiguity, to feel both the sting and the salve of what art can do. That’s its power: to disturb us into wakefulness, but also to cradle us when we need it most.

What I Read Between May and October 2024

Haven’t updated my “What I Read Between” -series in a while mainly due just being busy in my own life but also due to the fact that I’ve reading and rereading veeery big novels. But finally having been managed to finish those, let’s gather some thoughts.

Fyodor Dostoyevsky: Crime and Punishment (reread)

I’ve always been a huge fan of Russian literature, or at least a big fan of few Russian authors. Mainly due to this reason I wanted to embark on this “rabbit hole” during the summer months. Naturally, starting with Dostoyevsky.

I’ve read Crime and Punishment a couple of times during my lifetime. First, as a mandatory homework from school and later few times just out of pure enjoyment and I can say that it’s possibly one of my favorite books. To summarize, book is about Raskolnikov’s internal and external battles and the repercussions of the crimes he has done.

I love how the “crime” aspect of this book happens only in the 100 or so pages, and the rest (600 or so) are devoted to the “punishment”, which in this case means battles with psychological consequences of the crimes, insanity and isolation, ending in the moment of divine grace and beginning of Raskolnikov’s redemption.

Great book, cannot recommend it enough.

Fyodor Dostoyevsky: Notes from Underground (reread)

Along side Crime and Punishment, Notes from Underground is also a book that I’ve read multiple times from Dostoyevsky. Probably I stumbled upon this book when I was a “edgy” teenager, so I thought I could see some similarities between me and the protagonist.

Book focuses mainly on diving deep into the mind of man living in solitude. So a majority of the book is about questioning various everyday concepts, such as logic, reason, free will, and showing how suffering can add depth to our everyday life.

Again, very good book that encourages reader to not just read but also to think and reflect.

Fyodor Dostoyevsky: The Brothers Karamazov

The Brother Karamazov was one of the classics of Dostoyevsky that again for one reason or another I hadn’t read so I finally was able to finish it and what a book it was! Book itself focused where heavily on rich and absorbing ideas such as spirituality and logic and their contrast. So much so, that the plot of the book itself (while being great on its own) feels secondary to the exploration of these themes.

While the high level topics might be the main thing behind the book, I especially loved the way how Dostoyevsky embedded these themes in to the main characters of the book, the Karamazov family.

Book was pretty big with lots of different events and stories (even stories within a story) so couple of paragraphs doesn’t do it justice. Just this book alone deserves a separate post. I would even argue that just reading the book once doesn’t do it justice. That being said, I enjoyed the book tremendously, and I will be reading it again in the future.

David Foster Wallace: The Infinite Jest

The Infinite Jest has always been an interesting book for me. For many reasons. First, I’ve always thought David Foster Wallace to be an interesting character on its own right. But at the same time, for the the literary prowess that he had. I had read couple of works from him previously but Infinite Jest always felt like a somewhat of a herculean task to finish. Firstly due to its length, but also for how it was written.

I remember reading some interview from DFW, where he mentioned how he “wanted to write a best-seller, that was meant for literature students/professors”, which can definitely be seen in the book. The writing style in the book is very hard and difficult. Especially to someone from whom English is not their native language.

But overall I think the book was great. Especially the time in the current world made the book feel sort of “prophetic” in many ways. Despite the book itself is set in this dystopian world. But looking it with perspective of today’s world, it’s not that dystopian.

Similarly to The Brother Karamzov, couple of paragraphs doesn’t do the book justice, since it features hundreds of different characters, many of whom are just coping with modern technological world filled with loneliness and disconnection.

Again, a great book once you get into it, which definitely deserves an another read.